primary schoolmates gathering @ The Apartment

day before i sick.

went to the apartment @ the curve. its a nice restaurant, a strong concept they have. me, Qx, Leny, Dennis, Cy, Kw n his 'gf' attended. y shud i emphasis GF? omg his gf which is a ppl that we did not invited... pls, kno wat she said? she said our jokes not that funny so y she gonna laugh wit us wo?! wtf, 1 thg is i don really give a damn to her while she sit there with her bf for quite hours. she's so called invisible to us... damn! some more she's just an extra to us lo.. dont really care whether she's sitting there or not. 1st sight on her is already bad some more with this kinda dammit attitude she have? wtf? we just have a drinks some where do she need to dress up like a untie or maybe her so call mature look gua... and make up like a ghost? haha leny said maybe she's trying to make smoky eye but end up i really tot its a panda's eye..!! ahaha please its late nite already pls look after ur bitchy gf and don let her out to scare others man!

anyway, i'm not angry just telling some truth feeling here... and please dont act like ure fashionable, u're totally OUT! terrible panda eyes..

long time neva c Leny, she's still the same very talkative. we're same too as in the way we only talk with each other but not the so call bf n gf... please la... have fun guys s long s we happy coz dont think they'll care oso, keep doing those irritating reaction front of us last many times. ppl, dont act like u r very high classy ppl since u r not ppl will really fell it as in disgusting way dude...!

some candid taken @ Curve >> can u c the gf n bf??

Kabs gone SICK

im sick.. i wondering what happen to me... a whole body full of red dots, some more high fever... it is so torturing, i'm like a useless one sleep sleep and sleep whole day!! really hate this kinda feeling! last morning went to see doctor, he said i'm allegic. and give some medicine for me. i did take it on time, but still the same all the red dots still sticking with me! what the fuck! i'm really out of energy, only sleep i can do... all that medicines are so horrible to me! i don wan eat but still i have to!! long time never get sick... but thing comes seriously once i sick...

people always says, you'll know who is the true friends to you once u sick.. and now i get what they mean. thanks for all caring, i'm appreciate! for those not even care or whatever, i dont really give a fuck, no energy some more..

scare i can't catch up with my assignment. pray to god, get me recover well soon please!! i really like the current project.. and i can't lose...!!

Kabs gone SICK

im sick.. i wondering what happen to me... a whole body full of red dots, some more high fever... it is so torturing, i'm like a useless one sleep sleep and sleep whole day!! really hate this kinda feeling! last morning went to see doctor, he said i'm allegic. and give some medicine for me. i did take it on time, but still the same all the red dots still sticking with me! what the fuck! i'm really out of energy, only sleep i can do... all that medicines are so horrible to me! i don wan eat but still i have to!! long time never get sick... but thing comes seriously once i sick...

people always says, you'll know who is the true friends to you once u sick.. and now i get what they mean. thanks for all caring, i'm appreciate! for those not even care or whatever, i dont really give a fuck, no energy some more..

scare i can't catch up with my assignment. pray to god, get me recover well soon please!! i really like the current project.. and i can't lose...!!

grandpa @ hospital

this evening, grandpa breathless in a sudden, we brought him to a clinic nearby our house. but guess it's useless, he asked me to overnite at his hse to accompany him. at night, he really so hard to breath, n we finally send him to hospital...

we sent him to UM, which is a super sucks hospital..! poor service, poor DR n all!! how could the dr neva pay their professional to the patient?! we waited for a long time, n ya donno wat the hell we're waiting! the nurse keep saying wait them to arrange a wad for him, but guess how many hours we stay there? bout 6 hours man! from 9.30 to 4am!! wat the fuck?!

ok, we settle down in the room, but still cant sleep... haih.. dr n nurses keep coming in to check somethg n ask somethg.. n i'm the one who gonna overnite there to take care of grandpa.. till 9 the other morning, aunty came n exchange wit me, her turns to stay wit grandpa.. i str8 away went slp after reached home. wen i woke up at 5, i got headache n realize that im sick... some fever wit me... guess last nite neva sleep well n get cold in the wad...

really so farn.. fucked up again... fri is the deadline n seriously im still mess up wit my progress, bet i cant submit ontime. wat to do?! really fucked up wit my groupmates, isit my prob? or as wat they said thats my fate?! n now grandpa problem some more! grrr.. really donno wat to do! DAMN! who to blame?!

y grandpa breathless...? i think the virus spread to everywhere... n still he having lung cancer, so think thats the main point y he breathless... the time i look at him last nite... i really bad feeling... sometimes i even think how if god let him go... maybe thats the better way for him rather being torture.. my heart really pain looking at him... really feel that myself useless... its torturing him in the same time torturing us too... we're like helpless by stand aside looking at him... god gave us time to have our self prepare... i guess i can accept now if he really let go... sorry... i kno wat im sayin, maybe is bad... but its really torture us by looking at him without doin anythg...

p/s: thanks all f concern from u all my fren... im ok... still some headache... but guess time will prove everythg to me, god'll lead me the way..

Family DAY~~ HAPPY

tonite, we went out to the ship for dinner. wen i said we, this included me, mum n sis... we went shooping b4 that.

we talk a lot of thg... but 1 thing is my mum asked: if a man takle her, can we accept wit she be wit that man...?! my sis said YES, but im saying NO to her coz i need some time to cope wit... but after she explained to me... i really feel like wat she said really comes wit her point...

"if someone really good fall to her, y not she accept him..? n yet shes getting old, unless alone for the whole life? a good man fond of now doesnt mean that he will fond till the time wen i can accept." mean y don goes wit him since now the man likes her?! if she rejected, who know wat will happend at the future..?!

i suddenly realised that wat she said really right.. old folks use to say: 苏州过后没艇搭

is that rite?! we took a lot photos where we had a long time neva take photo together with her. feel like she recovering well from the stupid incident! glad to see that! oops n ya, super happy..!!! coz sis paid the bill!!!! ahahahahahaha

n don worry my frens our group are on our progressing, n i did do my assignm well K! no worries

my lovely HIM...

sure ppl think of other thgs wen i wrote my lovely HIM...

he is my grandpa.. yes is my lovely grandpa. hmm... he infected for lung cancer on mac of this year... things goes serious it is already worst to level 3 wen we had his body checked... yes, that time wen we 1st know he got this cancer, we extreamly depressed... but wat to do... no matter how expensive is the medical fees we oso gonna pay for it coz he is our man their father s well s my gong gong...! b4 cancer infect grandpa, we used to go breakfast evry sunday morning... but coz of this case happened we neva hang out together... coz its adi spread to his brain and makes right hand of him uncontrollable.. actually b4 this he oways told me wonder y his hand like out of control n cant really write keep shaking sometimes.. n im actually donno that that is really such serious as cancer... haih... a lot of thg happened. everytime wen i see him i have to act like very tough to prove him whether v shud hav positive thinking to gone thru it... even my parents they all keep crying all the times, m oso hafta act like ya evrythg gonna be orite, gonna be fine... but everytime wen i went bck to my room, i was like crying like hell... hmm... we gone thru all this n he is now in a beta condition, but still gonna check up n do his chemotheraphy once a week...

grandpa really love me n sayang me... i was like the most he love among other kids... n im really love him too. parents oways telling me, gong gong evrytime eat alot wen having his meal wit u... mm... this really make some guilty of mine... which i cant accomp him evrytime for evry meal sometimes.. n last week he told me that i hafta APPEAR once a time everyday at his hse... i feel weird y he suddenly tell me this... then i answered OK! without considering... seriously, i can spend wateva to him if i could really do to sactify him... wat to do... gong gong r now a day slimmer, n v all can c it obviously... i do wateva thg he expected me to do... everytime wen i go out wit him, i really wanna hug him n hold his hand walk together no matter how other ppl look at me... i don care s long s i can hold him n avoid evry bad thg happen to him...

this morning... he went toilet n cant control his shit n make the toilet dirty, i clean up wit evrythg... this is not the point... he feel so guilty yet shamed.. coz he feels like gimme trounble to clean up dirty... wen im cleaning the toilet the same time i tell him, u r my gong gong is my responsiblity to do all this to u who cares it is dirty or smelly?! i will clean it up for u wit no blamed! seriously, i don care whether its smelly or dirty... im willing to do all this to u with no blamed... gong, really i really do!

after that i went hospital wit him n parent for chemo. i chilled wit my aunt who is his daugther. she told me his condition getting worst but maybe we cant c it from outer part of grandpa's but is his inner part. dr told her he dont have much time left... asked me to treasure every moment wit him, i was like blur n the environment goes numb.. (b4 ths i really tot he recovering well, who knows) that time she telling me this i saw some tears coming out from her eyes... i said its ok... don need to be too depressed, as long as we do our best for him,, so that v wont regret in the future... the whole day moody... i really scared of that horrible day comes to me.. i don wan... i really don wan... i wan christmas, CNY n all the festive season wit my grandpa...

promised to god ill do the best to him n my myself unregrettable!! gong, i love u...

pic1> grandpa b4 diseased

THANKS TO ALL OF U...

Today my mood not really good... thinking of many things... suddenly feel like why a lot of thing happens to me this year...?! from my dearest grandpa's cancer to the divorced of both my dad n mum... hmm? i ask myself y? n seriously sometimes i really tired to face all this problem... just from the time i came bck from Aus evrything changed, noticed that im actually have 1 more so called 'sis' which my dad 'daugther' wit the other bitch! n somemore that 'daughter' was adi 4 years old!!! wat the fuck?! as u were me..? wat u gonna do..? huh? can u take it? everythg changed so as my lifestyle and all... last time wen i went out late dad sure wait for me, even he will scold... but now i came home late oso... like no1 care me anymore... why god created such thing to me? y so unfortunate? who to blame? the bitch or my dammit dad? huh?

i recieved a call just now bout 11++, is my dad.. he just asking y i haven slp and c whether my bro doin wat... his sound like actually bit sad... n my heart goes sour... but wen i think bck 4 yo daugther!! my mood turns bck moody!! thats really run ou of solution other than divorce, no doubt... gals out there can u bear wit a husband where he have another mistress and somemore a dauther aged 4? huh???

anyways, i think i really needs time to accept it... even it is an incident happens last month... gimme some time ler... really.... im asking who? i wonder too...

to all my dearest frens, this is y im not happy n moody recently... i kno u all care me so much, but sometimes it is hard to tell u all face to face... so wat to do, all i can is post it here so that u all will know wat happen to me...

li shan>a really good fren to me, who oways care me once i absent or late sure she will text me.. n just now, she sent me a msg says, kabs, pls come to tutorial tml, wat happen to u? anythg can tell me, i'll help u..

sweetie> i neva reply her msg coz really moody... she asked y neva go coll, n somemore sent me a testi @ frenster...!!! sorry dear, mm sometime i just wanna be alone n really thanks for caring... hugs

B> maybe sweetie told him n he text me too... he said anythg not happy can oways share wit him...

lin zhen> she text me too, she said pls come tml cls.. and encourage me to finish my project and show tutor..

shups> same thg give me a call n says somethg warmth...

really touching whereas i neva put any relavant text @ my display msg or wat wat wat.. to all my frens.. really appreciate wat u guys did to me... n i kno sometimes the problems are so horrible but thats the solution still... n i really needs some times to get used to it...

other than this, my o ranbbit's fren committed suiside last nite... hmm.. it is really a silly kinda thinking... y shud him choose the stupid ways to end up his life?! n ya, treasure everythg that u hav sort of frens, family members, gf, bf.... do wateva u wanted to do n u wont kno wat will happens tml... make ur life unregrettable.. my o rabbit, i oways here to company wen u sad!! sincerely

What happen to me?

i neva go coll this morning not even in the noon... it is so shame if i go n without showing anythg... as i told they don wanna tolerate.. but Jo rang me up his morning... and she said v finish it by tml... then wat shud i say? OK lo..

noon i accompany Poh hoi to celcom new product briefing at a golf club somewhere opposite eastin hotel. it is really kinda lame n yet super bored... haiz, wat to do he is my beat fren... kno him for many years that is 1 more gal or so called untie among us... 3 of us really close fren wen we was at the secondary schoool, but the girl got married n born twins... shes really a happiness wife of her husband... really glad to c that..! other then the briefing it is also a hari raya jamuan smthg like that la, then luckily we had our lunch there. although it is malaysian food but still nice coz it's buffet served..

pic 1: taken in Poh Hoi car... and i was like syiok sendiri whereby he dont give a damm, which i used to!! n he shows the stupid face like i;m forced him...>

pic2: me wit the event's attire: smart casual.. _ _lll but i saw a lot uncle neva wear so...>

pic 3: the figure taken in his car... horrible n not nice at all, i can say wateva i like,.. coz he not gonna view my blog oso... sigh~>

What happen to me?

i neva go coll this morning not even in the noon... it is so shame if i go n without showing anythg... as i told they don wanna tolerate.. but Jo rang me up his morning... and she said v finish it by tml... then wat shud i say? OK lo..

noon i accompany Poh hoi to celcom new product briefing at a golf club somewhere opposite eastin hotel. it is really kinda lame n yet super bored... haiz, wat to do he is my beat fren... kno him for many years that is 1 more gal or so called untie among us... 3 of us really close fren wen we was at the secondary schoool, but the girl got married n born twins... shes really a happiness wife of her husband... really glad to c that..! other then the briefing it is also a hari raya jamuan smthg like that la, then luckily we had our lunch there. although it is malaysian food but still nice coz it's buffet served..

Wat u really wan?!

went out wit winnie n B just now, we had a loooong time nvr chill out which only 3 of us. we chill till 3 o'clk.. talked a lot of issue... but same case oways happen, i'm oways have diff opinion with my B.. ok, he oways asked me to manage my financial.. sigh, ok... i will try la..! but bit not agree wit wat he said. u know wat, he oways talk out loud, n other peoples ard us keep looking at me, make it like im a problem guy!! but its really kinda funny hang out wit them..

other then that, 1 of my Aussie fren rang me up, he said they are doin good there. and will come bck at december. but Hin reject to come bck, he said he need work for money to plan for his future and sure for his lil gf too.. how sweet!! he's really a good man, just like our big brother in the hse, of course we still have our mother which is winnie.. we oways teasing both them.. haha really miss the time at Aus la.. everyday live our days without difficulty.. im saying like even thats some bad memories too, but still it's all valuble!! so ppl, don give up the chance to go out from malaysia if u have the chance! it's really wider up ur eye's sight!

still thinking to do my interface even though it was late, but Jo neva reply my msgs!!! i really don like to do group work!! i kno, but still have to stick wit it ma! grrrr... 1 of my groupmate somemore sick!!!! not to say wat, but sometime really fucked up wit all that, like me my self d only 1 to do all that... argh!!!!!!

hmm, "wat u really wan?!" i ask someone for quite many time, v r just a fren as u said.. then y still u keep on messaging me such fucking stuff!! wat miss me wat do care bout me?! wtf?!?! just tell me wat u wan.. wat so po ma?! huh? but, honestly i do miss someone too.. but im still trying hard to forget.. as i said it is not easy to built up a relationship, it's really takes a loooong time and once u end it up u will feel like erm isit too fragile n keep on saying i don wanna end up i don wanna end up.. things goes same, after u tried so hard to say u don wan end up like this for so many time, finally u will feel like fucked up yet bored.. n start thinking y im so stupid keep on asking the 1 come bck to me... is that lame? i;m oways think i'm good, y have to give up the whole forest just becoz of 1 nursery? huh??!?

i tried my hard to ask u bck to me, but since u don wan.. then ok lo, no comment.. but y still u said that to me? huh?? TELL ME la WAT U REALLY WAN?

photo1: we stayed 1 room at AUSSIE, no words can describe our relationship.. hee the purplr color shirt is HIN lol..

photo 2: Hin eating the pasta v cooked for him since he don like beef..

photo 3: no doubt, thats wai wai... block the scene=P

Wat u really wan?!